Tag Archives: 2013

I can fit in my birthday present

Let us reminisce of birthdays past. When I was but a lass of 38 my man gave me this fantastic gift. Grill, baby, grill!

grill 1

grill 2

grill 3

grill 4

grill 5

 

Climb on in

Steph can fit in a clown car!

clown car

Good job Steph.

Everybody loves a clown car.

Cutie patootie! This toddler fits in a shoe rack.

My favorite boys never disappoint.

shoe rack 1

shoe rack 2

shoe rack 3

shoe rack 4

shoe rack 5

Thanks for pics Ms. Hayley.

So you want to fit a vagina sculpture

You may have seen in the news recently that an American exchange student got stuck trying to fit in a vagina sculpture in Germany.

23-kid-stuck-in-vagina-statue-2.w560.h746.2x

23-kid-stuck-in-vagina-statue.w560.h375.2x

The artist, Fernando de la Jara, had this to say,¬†“It’s participatory art… It should be entered.” It’s just that, since the sculpture was installed in 2001, no one’s actually gotten stuck. “I believe [he got caught] because he had a lack of coordination” de la Jara said. “Or maybe it was a lack of sensibility.”

Leave it to experts, kiddo. THIS is how you fit a giant vagina sculpture.

11. Nelson

Been there, done that.

See more fitting in forbidden art here.

How to Decorate for the Holidays: Do Your Thing

poinsettia 1

Poinsettia, a poem by Marigold

For Christmas cheer the sepals sing

Red carols veined in holly green,

Potted plant, just do your thing,

And hide dark corners rarely seen.

In Sunday’s colours primp and preen,

With hot-house glitz, be-ribboned bling,

And over manger, gently lean,

Poinsettia, just do your thing.

poinsettia 2

Happy Holidays every one.

I Can Fit in a Korg Keyboard Case

More fun at work!

Keyboard a

Keyboard bDisclaimer: I don’t believe in sweater vests. Even though I am wearing one in these pictures, I still think they are stupid. It’s cold enough for a sweater but not for covering my arms? Or it’s warm enough for a t-shirt, but my boobs have a chill? I only bought this sweater vest because it was on sale at a vintage shop near Haight Ashbury and I thought it was cute and somehow temporarily forgot what a ridiculous item of clothing it is. All day I felt sort of cold and was also sweating and itchy.

Keyboard c

Keyboard d

Keyboard e

Keyboard f

What’s great about this last one is that you can see what a Miss Bossy Pants I am shouting directions at my co-worker even though he has basically just trapped me inside a zipped ventilation-less container. Thank you to my trusty assistant Nick!

I Can Fit Under a Bar Stool

Perhaps not my best decision ever. But this tall drink of water Heidi Aphrodite* whom I met while out having adventures with Tiffany-who-loves-karoake challenged me to fit under a bar stool and I was all, “Yeah, I can do that in about 4 seconds.” Which I did. But folks, I can’t advise you to do the same. Thank the Flying Spaghetti Monster there wasn’t gum or ahem somewhere on that chair.

*Note: Heidi Afrodite would be an amazing drag queen name.

Royalties please.

bar stool 1

bar stool 2

Trash Pile!!!

LOOK WHAT I FOUND!

I can fit in there and there and there and there and there.

Trash Pile a

Trash Pile b

Trash Pile c

Trash Pile d

Trash Pile e

Trash Pile f

Trash Pile g

Trash Pile h

Trash Pile i

Trash Pile j

Trash Pile k

THANK YOU and extra hugs to art director / photographer extraordinaire / trusty assistant Velda.

I Cans Fit With Bottles & Cans

Roses are red

Recyclingbins are blue

I can fit in

I bet you could too.

hmmm…

That “new trash can smell”

I’m sure it was swell.

It didn’t last long.

Is that egg foo yong?

recycling 1

recycling 2

Does my left eyebrow look weird like that in person?

**Thank you to my trusty assistants Kim & Kevin.**

I Can Fit in a Marimba Box

The marimba is musical instrument in the percussion family. It consists of a set of wooden bars with resonators. The bars are struck with mallets to produce musical tones. The bars are arranged as those of a piano, with the accidentals raised vertically and overlapping the natural bars (similar to a piano) to aid the performer both visually and physically. This instrument is a type of xylophone, but with broader and lower tonal range and resonators.

Also, a marimba is delivered in a 500 lb. box.

Marimba A

Marimba B

Marimba C

Marimba D

Marimba E

Marimba F

Marimba G

Marimba H

Marimba J

Marimba M

Marimba N

Marimba O  Marimba P

Marimba Q

Big thanks to my trusty assistant Kevin.